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Author's Note: This is really me doing my best Joshua Freeman impersonation.

Dear J. Freeman,

How are you, your work and family? Thank you for your response on the mail sent to you about a month ago, and I want you to know the reality on this transaction, this is not a matter of joke, I and my colleagues were overjoyed with your first response, but along the line you dissappointed us, well it is confidential matter, if you know you have interest on this transaction you can still get back to me through this same box, and if not get back to me as well so that we will be able to look for another interested person that can take good care of this.

Best Regards
Hon. Raymond Etiebet

Hello, Mr. Etiebet,

I am in quite excellent spirits, but I'm afraid I don't know exactly what you're talking about. Can you please fill me in? I'm getting a sneaking suspicion that my secretary, Mr. Land has been meddling in my affairs while I was in Paris looking for the proper model to donate some of her eggs to me.

I'm afraid I'll be forced to give Mr. Land a tongue lashing he won't soon forget, although I'm reluctant to use that term given his fondness for smearing his naked body with Alpo and liberating all of the dogs in the local kennel for what he likes to call his "woof-woof, licky-licky bath". Honestly, good help is SO hard to find. Sane help is even harder to come by.

So what's been going on? What are we supposed to be in the middle of here?

Joshua S. Freeman

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